Earlier tonight our landlord texted me saying that he was holding a viewing of our apartment tomorrow at 11.00 (a.m.). Let me clarify that, at 19.50 (7.50 p.m.) a Sunday evening he sent a text message telling me he was going to hold a showing of our apartment. No question if it was alright, just one line stating “Hi, viewing of your apartment tomorrow at 11. /Landlord”.
This time the message did bear a readable signature so I guess I should be happy about that. But.. it did not sit well with me. I’m usually very restrictive of who I invite to my personal space, not only psychologically but also locally. My home is my castle, in every sense, and I will defend it with tooth and nail against visitors, wanted or unwanted.
I think this way of thinking came from finally having a space to call my own. Where no one can put me down, bully or harass me. A space were I can let my guard down and not constantly having to worry about maintaining the façade. Growing up I didn’t have such a space. I had a room, but I was never allowed any alone time and if I shut the door, I was pushed onto the guilt train for excluding her. I was told that family doesn’t close the door on each other because we care and caring is keeping the door (literally) open.
This is hard to explain though, I know many take it extremely personal and I know it’s normal to invite your friends and family into your home. Some have looked at me like I’m a madman when I’ve said I just want to be left alone at home. I’m not interested in parties (at all to be honest) and I’d rather pay for some kind of restaurant or other place to keep the parties out of my rooms.
Of course I’d help a stranded relative or friend and offer them a place to sleep if their train or flight gets cancelled, but I will just as well also provide you with breakfast the next morning and drive you to the station or airport so you can be on your merry way.
We are moving into the new place with a strategy in the back of our minds though. We will hold some kind of fika or smaller party to let our families and friends come look at the new place before I have secured all the perimeters, dug the trench and installed the vault doors. We are kinda laughing at it, but we both know it will be for the best. That way everyone get what they want with as little friction as possible.
When it comes around though, I get that our landlord wants to showcase the apartment to secure a tenant that will be able to take over as soon as possible after we’ve left, I just wish he would have had better foresight and told me this a day or two in advance. But I guess there’s no time for that now.. I just don’t like the feeling of being rushed out. I’m not ready to let go of this place just yet.